Monday, February 16, 2009

Well, at least it wasn't a barbecue

This is from the disciplinary handbook for a "Christian" college. Back in the old days, folks like the ones that run Clearwater Christian College would burn you at the stake for being a witch. Nowdays, they just expel you. Progress!

A "Christian College" of this sort is sorta like a "non-alcoholic beer". It leaves out anything that makes the experience worthwhile, and adds nothing to your life other than the ability to say, "I survived four years of Christian College" or "I survived drinking a non-alcoholic beer". You're not any smarter or anything at the end of the experience, you just have a piece of paper that says BS on it, or an empty non-beer can.

Think about it. Faith, for the evangelical Christians who found these kinds of colleges, is about, well, not asking questions. Education is about, well, asking questions. A "Christian college" is inherently a contradiction in terms and the result can be called "education" only in the same way that a non-alcoholic "beer" can be called beer.

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin


  1. Strangely enough, their web site has a "campus life" link.

    I can sure see where they get their mindset, but what this boot camp-penal order vindictiveness has to do with the Christin Faith beats me.

    who really likes that long-haired dude from Nazareth

  2. Whoops, that was meant to be ChristiAn.

  3. There are some other tidbits that I find interesting; some of which are activities that happen off campus. Seems more like a prison than a school. I bet they only have one "text book."

    At the bottom, you can see they will even fine you if you stay out too late (on a per minute basis). Better hope the spirit doesn't move you so much at the revival that you're late in getting back home.

  4. I was stupid enough in my youth to attend one of these schools for a couple of years. I count 22 of the above rules that I repeatedly violated.
    Iwasn't kicked out during the school year, but they did tell me I wasn't welcome back the next semester.


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