Mittens has a secret plan for uninsured

The Romneybot clanked and computed and spit out to Jay Leno that his health plan was going to take care of the uninsured who were uninsured through no fault of their own, but the uninsured who were uninsured by choice would just have to die. He did not / could not reveal details of his secret plan, but it exists, he claims, because he said so and robots cannot lie, right?

Of course, we already know the Romneybot's secret plan for the uninsured:

1. Don't get sick
2. If you do, die quickly.

Alrighty, then!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Republican generosity in Michigan

Republicans in Michigan are cutting families off of food stamps and assistance programs, with this result:

Last week, while working on a documentary about hunger in Michigan, Russ Russell had an experience that left him speechless.

I was visiting with this family and one of the little boys said he wasn’t going to eat,” said Russell, development director for Forgotten Harvest, a Detroit-based nonprofit that rescues and redistributes fresh food. “He said, ‘Oh, I’m not eating dinner because it’s my brother’s turn tonight. Tomorrow is my night.’”

But the GOP in Michigan generously does provide GED programs. I'm sure this little boy thanks Republicans for their generosity in providing GED books every time that he goes to bed hungry. Or maybe not, since little boys need food, not GED books, the little ingrates.

- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

The Village is panicking

They've declared Mitt Romney the winner in Michigan despite the fact that Rick Santorum picked up just as many delegates as the Romneybot did. Think about that -- the Romneybot was created and lived its childhood in Michigan, yet familiarity truly *did* breed contempt, Michigan voters gave Romney a slight plurality (3%!!!) but he didn't even manage to break the 50% barrier.

In other words, in Michigan more than half of the Republican voters won't vote for Romney. Even in Arizona, where Romney was the clear winner, more than half of the Republican voters didn't vote for Romney. In fact, Romney has *never* broken the 50% mark.

Unless the Romneybot's handlers can dig up better programmers to implement the "charisma", "likability", and "personality" subroutines in its programming, the chances of The Romney winning in November are similar to the chances of The Romney winning American Idol. It could happen, but only if President Obama got caught in bed with a dead girl or a live boy. Just sayin' ;).

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Gingrinch PAC releases anti-Romney movie

The fascinating thing is that, unlike most of what Romney says, the facts I tried checking out in this video actually checked out. Romney's group of corporate raiders was all about stripping assets out of profitable companies that they took over in hostile takeovers and turning them into bankrupt shells, as Romney's group walked away with millions of dollars from stripping the assets and the workers of the former profitable company were thrown out on the streets.

Yesterday while driving home I caught Gingrinch being interviewed on CNN Radio. You got the sense it's not about votes with the Grinch now. This is personal. His distaste and disdain for Romney was so visceral that you almost expected spittle to come out of the radio speakers.

-- Badtux the Dwarf-race-watchin' Penguin

Quick hits

Tiny Kim apparently has the support of the security services, which has now sent a number of senior Party officials tiptoeing through the tulips. Seems Tiny Kim ain't as dim as he might have seemed from his early appearances and isn't going to be tiptoeing through the tulips himself anytime soon -- or turnips either, given the abysmal yield of North Korean agriculture over the past couple of decades.

Gratuitous video of new North Korean dictator:

In other news, Newt the Gingrinch appears to think he's running for President of North Korea, what with basically proposing to take judges who rule in ways he don't like out behind the barn and shoot'em in the head or somethin'. The sad part is that there's a large contingent of Americans who break out in giant shit-eatin' grins at the very thought, who have no problem with the notion of living under a North Korean style dictatorship, as long as it's *their* dictator.

Who are the 1% and what do they do for a living? Hint: It ain't work in the way you and I think of work.

Regulations are not a huge jobs killer. Like, duh. If there's demand for my product I don't give a shit about what regulations I have to comply with, I'm gonna hire folks to produce more product.

50% of Americans are too poor to pay Federal income taxes, but they still pay plenty of other taxes, starting with the 15% payroll tax that the 1% (who don't work for a living, they "invest" for a living and don't earn income, they earn "capital gains") don't pay.

The wealth gap, graphically. It ain't a pretty picture.

Why haven't any of these Wall Street fraudsters gone to prison yet, again? Oh wait, because they're "job creators" in some alternate universe where unicorns are pink and cotton candy grows on trees. Alrighty, then!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Rats are more empathetic than Republicans

When a rat hears another rat in distress, that rat will immediately go to help the rat in distress. Furthermore, if they had a chocolate treat, they'd share that treat with the rat that they helped.

So what happens when a Republican sees someone in distress? Well, the first thing they do is ignore the person in distress. See previous post. Next, if they're feeling particularly generous, they might install a switch to allow the person in distress to escape his trap -- a switch which is *outside* the trap, which the person caught in the trap can't reach (e.g., offering mental health services to the mentally ill... out of reach of the person *inside* the trap of mental illness). But that's the end of any empathy. Past that point, it's "get a job, bum!" or "it's your own fault you got caught in a trap, don't whine to me for help!" and a shrug of the shoulder and move on. And if the cries of distress on the part of those caught in the trap become too disturbing, they dispatch the popo to beat the shit out of those in distress in order to shut up that annoying whining from people who are dying. Because as far as lizard people from planet Sociopath are concerned, human beings are just another kind of vermin, and if vermin makes untoward noise, well. Beat it until it's no longer capable of making noise, right?

Sad, isn't it, that rats are more empathetic than a large percentage of Americans?

-- Badtux the "Guess I have more in common with rats than I thought!" Penguin

Close to 50% of Americans are now poor

A couple of weeks ago, I noted a quietly released and completely unpublicized (except by the official magazine of the Communist Party, WTF is that, that the Communists cover the US better than our so-called "free" press?) Social Security income report which inadvertently pointed out that the median income of the average American was near the poverty line for a family of four, and well under the 133% mark that most experts consider "poor". That is, if you are a single-income family of four in America, you're likely poor. And the Great Recession has made a lot of single-income families of four -- and some no-income ones, for that matter.

Now Census data pretty much confirming the Census data has been released and even our snoozing press had to pay attention to the fact that 1 in 2 Americans are now poor. And mayors are saying that a significant number of people needing food assistance aren't getting any because of cuts to food banks and other social safety networks, but hey, let them eat cake, right? Congratulations, Republicans. Your project, 30 years in the making, to turn America into the world's biggest banana republic with a stinking rich oligarch class and everybody else a poor-ass serf is coming to fruition. Bet you're proud.

-- Badtux the Banana-eating Penguin

Newt and the Israelis

There's been a predictable uproar on the left about Newt Gingrich's statement that there's no such thing as a Palestinian. The problem is, to a certain extent, he's right.

See, here's the thing. We're Americans. In America, nationality is what nation you live in. But it is only here in America that lines on a map determine nationality. In most of the world, people identify their nationality by language, culture, and ethnicity. If you speak German, are culturally German, and are descended from Germans, you are German whether you live in Poland, the Czech Republic, or in Germany proper. Your forefathers can have lived on a plot of land in the Czech Republic for 100 years, you can be the 3rd generation born in the Czech Republic, and you are still German as far as everybody in Germany and the Czech Republic are concerned. Similarly if you speak Mandarin, are ethnically Han Chinese, and are culturally Chinese, then you are Chinese whether you live in China, Vietnam, or Indonesia. That is, the nation you live in doesn't define your nationality in most of the world, rather, your language, culture, and ethnicity does. And from that perspective, there isn't a Palestinian people -- there are merely Arabs, who speak the same language as all other Arabs, who have the same culture as all other Arabs, who are genetically identical to all other Arabs.

Now, back to Gingrich's statement. Gingrich was merely paraphrasing Israel PM Golda Meir's statements from the early 1970's. Golda Meir was one of the founders of the modern state of Israel and her statement was typical of the attitude of the founders of Israel. Remember, the founders of Israel were European. From their perspective, there was no such thing as a Palestinian people because there is no distinct Palestinian language, culture, and ethnicity. From their perspective there were Arabs who happened to be citizens of a pseudo-state called "Palestine" that did not exist prior to 1920, a pseudo-state set up by Britain as part of the division of the Ottoman province of Trans-Jordan at the fall of the Ottoman Empire, a pseudo-state populated by people who were no different culturally, ethnically, or genetically from any other Arab, who had a dozen other Arab states similarly created from thin air after the fall of the Ottoman Empire to go to. From their perspective, the "Palestinian Problem" was a problem caused by Arab rulers refusing to take in their Arab brothers as citizens, and had nothing to do with Israel.

From that perspective, what Gingrich said made sense. Gingrich's problem is that the facts on the ground are different than in 1973. Israel agreed to create a Palestinian nationality (which is still not a Palestinian people from their POV, just another fake nationality created by Europeans), and set up a Bantustan-style "Palestinian Authority" on the Gaza Strip and West Bank as part of their peace treaties with Egypt and Jordan. In exchange Egypt and Jordan gave up their territorial claims on the Gaza Strip and West Bank and Yasser Arafat agreed to lead said Bantustan in exchange for stopping attacks on Israel. Gingrich's view is still held by the vast majority of Israelis, who do not view Palestinians as a people, just as a fake nationality created by Europeans as part of their division of the Arab people after WW1, but Israel is not living up to their half of the agreements that they agreed to, which do not allow "settlers" on the West Bank and Gaza Strip. That, and not Gingrich's statements (which to a certain extent are factually true from the point of view of most of the world), are the real issue here.

Note that my explanation of what Israelis think does not mean that I condone or encourage such thinking. Long-term it's a recipe for utter disaster for reasons adequately explained elsewhere. I'm just telling you things you probably don't know because you won't hear them in the left-wing echo chamber -- indeed, that you're unlikely to hear anywhere outside of Israel, unless you are talking to actual Israelis.

-- Badtux the Reality-based Penguin

The Apprentice Rebooted

Announcer: Welcome to this new season of The Apprentice! Here to my left is Newt Gingrich.

Newt: Hello peoplesssssss....

Announcer: And here to my right, is the star of our show, the fabulous and famous Donald Trump!

[Much clapping and cheering from audience in response to "Applause" sign lighting over the stage.]

DT: Thank you, thank you, I love you all!

Announcer: We have a very special season of The Apprentice for you. Mr. Newt Gingrich came up with an amazing idea for this season...

[Cut to Newt videotape]

Newt: See, it'll be, like, the last season of The Apprentice. Except this year, it will be ten poor kids!

[Cut to DT videotape]

DT: Amazing idea, my good buddy! So many of these underprivileged children have no idea what it means to work, nobody in their life works after all. What's that, Rosie? Time for my shower? Thank you, take away my bathrobe to the laundry please and make sure my pillow is fluffed the way I like it.

[Cut back to live]

Announcer: And now we'll introduce our first two contestants... Ethan Gonzales and Latasha Washington! Come on out, children!

[Two children, a Hispanic boy and a black girl each of which is approximately ten years old, walk out on the stage. Both are dressed semi-formally, the boy in black sneakers, khaki pants and a white polo shirt, the girl wearing black Mary Janes with white ankle socks and a plaid jumper over a white blouse.]

Announcer: Say hello to our audience, children!

Ethan: Hi! [Waves]

Latasha: Hello! [Smiles and waves.]

Announcer: So tell me, Ethan, how do you feel about being on this exciting television show with the marvelous Mr. Donald Trump?

Ethan: I... I'm honored. I hope to learn everything I can from Mr. Trump and make something of myself!

Announcer: And you, Latasha?

Latasha: I'm happy to be here, Donald Trump is a great man and generous to give me this opportunity and I won't let it go to waste!

Announcer: Alright! That's the attitude! And now for your first assignment...

[A helper brings out a mop bucket and a mop, places the bucket at Ethan's feet, and hands the mop to Ethan.]

Announcer: Your first assignment is to mop the floor in the executive washroom! It's right through that door!

Ethan: Wha... what?

Donald Trump: [Walks out with a big grin on his face]: YOU'RE FIRED!

[Ethan breaks down bawling, and is led off the stage, crying and sniffling. The mop falls to the floor during this process and a helper comes out and picks the mop up, while Donald gloats looking offstage as the crying and sniffling slowly fade into the distance.]

Announcer: And are you ready for your big assignment, Latasha?

[Latasha merely glares at him. The assistant attempts to hand her the mop. She folds her arms in front of her and it merely falls on the floor]

Announcer: You get to mop The Donald's dressing room floor!

Latasha: Like hell. [Turns to Donald] Don't bother firing me, asshole. I'm outta here. [Exits stage left].

[Newt walks out on stage]

Newt: Children these days. They just don't know their place.

DT: Yes. Sad, isn't it? No wonder those children get nowhere in life. They simply don't value hard work!

Announcer: Well after this commercial break we'll bring out our next two contestants here on... Child Apprentice!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

[Based upon a true story].

You're a mean one, Mr. (Gin)Grinch

Okay, so Newt Gingrich says poor kids should get started early on their future careers as bathroom cleaners.

And, of course they should do this while hungry, because Newt the Lizard says that food stamps are just like credit cards and should be discontinued. Erm, except of course food stamp ECT cards are not like credit cards. The cash registers at stores that accept them are programmed to accept them only for the food items on the ticket -- all other items checked out must be paid for via some other way. I know this because I see people using these things as I check out at the grocery store, where they slide their card through the ECT machine, and then dig in their purse for random loose coins to pay for the few things not covered by the food stamp program. If Newt the Grinch had ever checked out at a grocery store recently he'd know this. Oh wait, I forget, Newt the Grinch never goes grocery shopping. Like most lizard people, he probably eats flies and live kittens for dinner.

What next, will Newt bite the head off of a puppy on live TV for his next trick? That's about the only way he can top wanting to work to death and starve little children, yo.

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Shamelessly swiped

-- Badtux the Non-Randian Penguin

Slave labor: The new cool

One county in Georgia has a solution for those outrageous salaries that firefighters are getting: Convict them of crimes, send them to prison, then assign them back to firehouses as prison laborers. Pure genius! If only the good colonels of the Old Confederacy had been so ingenious, they coulda kept slavery going in the South, like, forEVAH!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

(Who doesn't look good in stripes, thus is glad he's not in Georgia).

Supporting our troops

Where does the GOP get these debate audiences? Oh wait, scratch that, they get them from the same place they get their debate candidates:

Not a single candidate thanked a soldier in Iraq for his service.

Even the right-wing National Review is somewhat baffled by that. Okay, so yes, Stephen Hill is gay (and one big buff bohunka of a gay, if I say so myself, if I was gay I could see myself going totally yummy over him), and was asking a question about the recently-repealed Don't Ask Don't Tell which allowed him to come out of the closet, but he's also a soldier serving in Iraq. And Republicans support our troops, right?

-- Badtux the Not-so-buff Penguin

Quote of the Day

"I don't consider whatever share of my tax dollars is going to keep [the uninsured, the disabled, or just plain unsavory] alive to be a waste of money. It is the cost I'm willing to pay to be able to look myself in the mirror and see a human being looking back."

-- NZForm

But of course lizard people don't have any problem with looking at themselves in the mirror and not seeing a human looking back, because, doh, they're LIZARD PEOPLE, why would they want to see a human looking back?

-- Badtux the Unlizardy Penguin

Grayson was right

The crowd at the Teabagger Debate *cheered* yesterday when the scenario of a 30 year old dying due to lack of health insurance was introduced.

Cheered.

Don't believe me? See for yourself:

What kind of people cheer at the thought of dead human beings? Not humans, surely. Surely that must have been a crowd of lizard people from Planet Sociopath, right? Right?!

It seems that Alan Grayson was right...

-- Badtux the Sickened Penguin

Too true

During the first two years of the Obama administration the Republicans filibustered a record number of bills to keep Obama from passing his agenda. For the past year they've done their best to destroy the economy because they view that as the best chance to get Obama out of office. The needs of the American people have been nowhere on the Republican agenda.

-- Badtux the "Just the facts" Penguin

H/T

That book

I suppose I should say something about that book. You know, THAT book. The one released by Dear Former Real Leader Darth "I'm a Dick" Cheney? Thing is, I haven't read it. I've been told that he admits, even gloats, about war crimes in it. I've been told that he gloats about being in charge for the first six years of the GWB Presidency. But based on this review, the fundamental problem with the book is that Dick Cheney tries to prove he's human, and instead proves he's a lizard person from Planet Sociopath -- a fact which we already knew. So why should I bother reading it? Maybe I'll pick it up for 80% off in the remainder bin a few weeks from now. Or maybe not. I have better things to do, after all. Like watching the grass grow. Or viewing kitty porn on YouTube. Or even just staring at the ceiling, for cryin' out loud, probably more entertaining than dousing myself into the sewer that is Dick Cheney's soul.

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

A most fabulous jihad

Rick Santorum, R(Dog-on-Dog), complains that gay activists are conducting a most fabulous jihad against him. Poor little Ricardo, oppressed by those wicked, wicked gay people... you gotta watch out for those drag queens and leather boys, they got claws, yo. Case in point:

'Nuff said ;).

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

The new nigger-knocking

Looking at the right-wing insistence that the poor aren't really poor because the poor aren't starving to death and dying in the streets in mass numbers, I was initially baffled. Over 40 million Americans receive "food stamps" via the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program. That's over 13% of Americans. And the eligibility requirements for that program are high -- for example, if you are a single male, you basically aren't eligible. Over 50 million Americans are enrolled in Medicaid. That's around 17% of the population of the USA. And again, the eligibility requirements for that program are very stringent -- e.g., if your car is worth more than $2,000, forget it, no Medicaid for you, and single men aren't eligible period -- so this undoubtedly underestimates the number of poor people. And finally, thanks to Social Security propping up the incomes of older Americans, a larger percentage of the young than the old are poor -- 20% of children are being raised in poverty.

Given that we have close to 20% of Americans requiring monthly food assistance and medical assistance to keep from starving to death or dying of treatable illnesses, the notion that they aren't poor doesn't pass the laugh and giggle test. Yes, our poor have it better than the poor in Somalia thanks to these government programs that keep them from starving to death or dying of treatable illnesses... but do right wingers seriously submit that receiving food and medical assistance makes you somehow NOT poor?

But of course, the whole point of this exercise, for the oligarchs who run the GOP, has nothing to do with facts. It didn't occur to me until this morning what's going on: It's that old game of the New Confederacy, NIGGER KNOCKING, where Southern politicians competed to tell poor white trash, "You may be poor, but at least you're not a NIGGER! And we're going to keep those niggers in their place!" The point being that if the oligarchs could keep one class down further than the white trash, then they didn't have to address the lack of educational opportunities, lack of healthcare, and lack of adequate housing amongst poor whites. Because if a white man complained about his status, he was told "hey, look, you have it better than niggers at least!"

And of course Somalis and Mexicans are the new niggers in this scenario -- two nations basically destroyed by the United States or its proxies, kept down just like the black population of the New Confederacy prior to the Civil Rights Act. And now the poor white trash are being told "hey, you're not rich, but look, at least you're not a MEXICAN!" As if that somehow makes them any less poor, the fact that some other group of people has it worse than them.

Will it work? Well, it worked in the New Confederacy for generations -- by keeping the blacks down, the oligarchs who ran the New Confederacy managed to avoid the sort of investments in human capital that turned places like New York and California into thriving engines of innovation. Will it work today? Well... I haven't seen that poor white trash have gotten any smarter. After all, that's the oligarch's plan, as it's been for generations -- to keep the majority of their constituents so poor, working so hard, and so undereducated that they'll buy whatever drivel the oligarchs are handing out. So why *wouldn't* it work?

Or as JzB is fond of saying: WASF.

-- Badtux the Once-poor(*) Penguin

And yes, it sucked big time -- I much prefer my current situation where I'm in the upper quintile rather than the lower quintile.

The Haunting of Penguin's Iceberg

If you were going to be haunted by a ghost, whose ghost would be your worst nightmare?

My selection: Milton Friedman. As I tried to sleep at night, he'd be nattering on about how public schools are socialism and should be abolished. As I showered in the morning, he'd be droning on about why Social Security should be privatized. When I got home in the evening and was trying to cook dinner, he'd be nattering along about how local regulations banning trans-fats in fried foods were Big Brother and a violation of people's right to kill themselves eating substances that they don't know are in the foods they're eating.

My guess is that I wouldn't last more than a few days before having a nervous breakdown. The cops would catch me running down the street, throwing random objects at something they can't see while shouting "Shut up! Just *SHUT UP!*" and I'd be in the loony bin faster than you can say "penguin".

Now, granted, there's other candidates. Like the crazy ex-girlfriend. At least Milty's ghost would never ask, "does this sheet make me look fat?" But still, I can't think that she would be any more annoying dead than alive... and unlike live Milton Friedman, who I could simply tune out by shutting my door in his face or turning the TV off when he appeared on one of the stuffed shirt shows, dead Milton Friedman could walk through walls. The horror, oh the horror!

-- Badtux the Irreverant Penguin

Do not stare into those eyes, for if you do, the insanity shall swallow you whole!