Tuesday, June 12, 2007

What next, sacrificing vestal virgins to put out forest fires?

The Governor and officials in Georgia have come up with the one true solution to their drought problems. No, not water conservation, or disaster proclamations giving low-interest loans to farmers, or anything like that. No pushing for a solution to global warming and its resulting climate change. No, they have a far more effective solution to their drought problems: travel throughout Georgia assembling farmers and others in the community, asking them to be faithful and continue their prayers for rain.

Prayer. That's it? That's their solution?

Crap, I'm going about this business of hacking together cool computer software all wrong. Instead of, like, doing that hard thinking and doing stuff, I ought to just be praying and, lo and behold, God shall deliver!

I can't wait to see these guy's solution to the problem of forest fires. If it doesn't involve sacrificing vestal virgins, it'll probably involve Bible readings or something. I propose that we line all these useless people up in the path of a forest fire with their Bibles in hand, reading passages from Psalms at the top of their voice. Meanwhile the rest of us can use a little common sense (which apparently ain't too common nowdays) and grab our shovels and mount our bulldozers and dig a fireline *behind* them to stop the fire. Let's see who's more effective at stopping the fire. Gah! The stupid! It hurts!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin


  1. Well, we are talking about Georgia here. The same state where some crazy lady sued to get Harry Potter pulled off library bookshelves because it "encourages witchcraft." Praying for Jeebus to water your crops sounds about par for the course, given the environment.

  2. Just remember Lester Maddox!

  3. Maybe we could get them to stand in the path of the fire an pray.

  4. What in the hell do you expect out of the bible belt?

    Sadly, it may bring you down. But not me because I'm omnipresent.

    I'm not an overweight penguin with a jeep justifying how I screw up this plant. :-)

    Just saying, hugs.

  5. Maybe if they all pray real hard at the same time? Yikes.


  6. Sacrifice vestal virgins in Georgia? Why would you want to kill a bunch of three year old girls (who can't run very fast)?



Ground rules: Comments that consist solely of insults, fact-free talking points, are off-topic, or simply spam the same argument over and over will be deleted. The penguin is the only one allowed to be an ass here. All viewpoints, however, are welcomed, even if I disagree vehemently with you.

WARNING: You are entitled to create your own arguments, but you are NOT entitled to create your own facts. If you spew scientific denialism, or insist that the sky is purple, or otherwise insist that your made-up universe of pink unicorns and cotton candy trees is "real", well -- expect the banhammer.

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.