Thursday, January 07, 2010

War on... what again?

Just thinking about the Underpants Bomber. I haven't posted on it before because, well, there's no "there" there. Some cretin tried to light his junk, got tackled by other passengers, problem ended. Worthy of about 15 minutes on the nightly news, then story over until the moron goes to trial, at which point he gets another 15 minutes of fame. Yawn. BORE-ing.

But then there came the collective underwear-soiling reaction of the Reich Wing and their enablers in the press, a collective underwear-soiling that is still going on today, and slowly I realized that the Underpants Bomber is a perfect symbol of the "War on Terror". Because the war isn't *really* on "terror" (which, after all, is a tactic, and you can't go to war with a tactic). Rather, it's really a War on Clean Undies -- a concerted attempt to have the American public soil their undies whenever prompted to do so. And the Underpants Bomber's roasted undies are the perfect symbol to use to prompt the American people to soil their undies once again.

Clean undies. According to the Reich Wing, they're the terrorist's best friends. Soil your undies upon prompting by your Party commissars in the media, or the terrorists win!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin


  1. roflmao, thanks Badtux

  2. So the bacon strip in my tighty whities is patriotic? whooood' a thunk it. Nice to know I've patriotic all these years. I'm calling my ex wife right now and ask her why she hates America!

  3. No no, Lahru, it has to be an all-out full crap-fest in your drawers for it to qualify as loving America. As in...


    Did you soil your britches with the full contents of your bowels? If not, why not? AMERICA HATER!

    -- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

  4. I watched Pres Husein answer your question. The war is on Al Queda. This is less conceptually disjoint than a war on terrah, but still lacking in coherence, IMHO.

    Anyway, it was a bit refreshing to see a relatively adult reaction, and a plan of action that at leaqst makes sense on it's own terms.

    No wonder his picture is up on Times Square.

    JzB the I hate fucking advertising trombonist

  5. least, not leaqst.

    JzB the this is why I don't play piano trombonist

  6. A buddy of mine is hopping on a plane tomorrow. My advice to him was to wear clean undies. since he's of a somewhat dusky complexion and wears a beard, he's virtually assured of getting his tighty whities searched for bombs.


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