Friday, July 29, 2005

Whither the "War on Terror"?

Okay, so you already know that the Global War on Terror is over. And the terror won, of course. The Orwell Administration couldn't function without terror, after all.

So now they've re-named it to the Global Struggle Against Violent Extremism. But sooner or later, someone is going to notice that "violent extremism" is an accurate description of Mad King George's regime (I mean, Mad King George has "only" killed some 100,000 or so innocent Afghan and Iraqi civilians with his violent extremism).

It is clear that we need a better term, one that is accurate without being embarrasingly so. So this penguin, fortified with mind-boggling quantities of herring and alcohol, has endeavored to produce one, and come up with:

Global Fight Against Those Sitting on our Oil (G-FATSO).

This acronym pithily sums up a) the girth of the average American, and b) The ultimate motivation for this global "struggle".

Gotta go now, that herring is threatening to come up the wrong way...


- Badtux the Sloshed Penguin


  1. I was right!

    It's a struggle when you can't get your pants on because of weight gain.

  2. Global Fight Against Those Sitting on our Oil (G-FATSO).

    Damn! I need to jog.........


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