Friday, August 11, 2006

Bad penguin joke

Two penguins walked into a bar, which was really stupid cause the second one should have noticed.

-- From the Internets


  1. Guy walks into a bar with a penguin sitting on his head. The bemused bartender asked, "What can I do for you?"

    Penguin replies, "You can help me get this guy off my ass!"


  2. ha hah ah

    ...took me a moment!

  3. Thank you for telling that joke the way it's supposed to be told. I heard it about blonds and the girl who told it to me thought she was pretty darned witty. Once she got punched, she realized she wasn't as funny as she thought she was! Ha. She really didn't get punched, but she did get lectured.

    So, I hope none of these are close relatives.

  4. this drunk guy walks into a bar in san diego and asks the bartender, "do penguins live here?" the bartender says "no, it's too warm for penguins here." the drunk says "then i just ran over a nun."

  5. Speaking of Nuns:
    Mother Superior called all the Nuns together one evening and said to them:

    "I must tell you all something. We have a case of Gonorrhea in the convent."

    "Thank God," said an elderly Nun at the back.

    "I'm so sick of Chardonnay."

  6. You're gettin' as bad as Gordon.

  7. A penguin walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer. "That will be $7.50 please" says the bartender. So the penguin gives the bartender his money and starts to sip his beer. "You know we don't very many penguins in here" mutters the bartender.

    The penguin replies, "At these prices it's no wonder!"

  8. A penguin drives his car up to a mechanic's shop. The penguin says "Something's wrong with it, could you have a look?" The mechanic says "Sure but it might take me half an hour." The penguin says that's fine, he'll just take a walk around the neighborhood.

    So the penguin takes a walk and sees an ice cream parlor. Penguins love ice cream, because it reminds them of home, so he steps in and has a cone. Then he walks back to the mechanic.

    The mechanic comes out and says "Looks like you blew a seal." The penguin says "Nah it's just ice cream."


Ground rules: Comments that consist solely of insults, fact-free talking points, are off-topic, or simply spam the same argument over and over will be deleted. The penguin is the only one allowed to be an ass here. All viewpoints, however, are welcomed, even if I disagree vehemently with you.

WARNING: You are entitled to create your own arguments, but you are NOT entitled to create your own facts. If you spew scientific denialism, or insist that the sky is purple, or otherwise insist that your made-up universe of pink unicorns and cotton candy trees is "real", well -- expect the banhammer.

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