Well, I saw that keyword in my keywords on the last post, so here we go! So, what's been happening in the wide world of tasers lately, other than cops tasering stray cats and lost Polocks, and random drunks in a bar fight?
Well, y'know, I always wanted to give an electric shock to those obnoxious people who boom and thump through town with their music too loud. The Galvestion P.D. approves. Yay! Too bad I can't call the Galveston P.D. when my downstairs neighbor starts playing Mexipop at full blast downstairs. Oh well, at least I don't have to worry about anybody breaking in to my apartment (they're my "security", or, rather, the various rather thuggish relatives who hang about are, since I've been polite to them and given them a hand from time to time with car problems and such).
A doctor dies of a mysterious seizure disorder that just happens to only happen after he got stunned by a taser. Now, it appears that he was in the midst of a petite mal seizure when the cops stopped him, so the cops pulled him out of his car and, rather than get medical attention for him... well, fuck, they shocked the motherfucking shit out of this motherfucker, fuck yeah! Now, as far as I know a petite mal seizure is not fatal, well, not unless you're getting the shit shocked out of you as you're getting beaten by a bunch of dumb fuck cops who can't tell the difference between someone having a seizure and someone who's just being a stubborn bastard (for the record I can tell the difference, but that is because I once knew someone who both suffered from petite mal seizures and was a stubborn bastard), but what the fuck.
But anyhow, none of those win the Don't Tase Me Bro award for this week. Rather, the winner is... Taser catches man's pants on fire.
Ouch. That hurts where a man lives. If you know what I mean.
-- Badtux the Male Penguin