Sunday, September 11, 2011

Welcome to National Pee Your Pants Day

Today is a national holiday where everybody pees their pants on command while chanting "Save me, oh kindly Big Brother!". We are supposed to either cower in terror that Zombie Dead Osama is coming to get us, or we're supposed to go grab our guns and go kill a darkie for Jeeeezus! The television airwaves today will be filled with death porn commemorating the murder of a couple thousand people in New York City and a few hundred elsewhere with Important People solemnly intoning "we shall never forget". The question of *what* we shall "never forget" is never asked. We've certainly forgotten the names and faces of those who died on September 11, 2001, after all. Well, unless you're one of those who lost a friend or relative in the attack, but folks who lost a friend or relative in the attack aren't one of the Important People who will be intoning "we shall never forget", they'll be someplace private where they can avoid all the death porn.

And let's not even think about all the hundreds of thousands of deaths of innocent civilians and not-so-innocent soldiers (both American and otherwise) that were "justified" by the fact that "them darkies attacked us!" (for any random darkies that had nothing to do with the 9/11 attacks, such as Iraqis, the Taliban, and so forth), or the loss of civil liberties where you now must accede to an anal probe and carry an internal passport oops "government-issued ID" if you want to travel more than a few hundred miles from your home or even vote in many states (gosh , just like the Soviet Union!), or any of that. No no, this is a solemn day, where we worship death while whipping out our big swinging dicks and, like, jizzin' *all over*, not just on our own country, but in random other places overseas where we swing our dicks and jizz all over'em just because, well, because we can.

So it goes. It's enough to drive a penguin to the sauce. Herring sauce, that is.

-- Badtux the Rude Penguin


  1. With this treasonous post, you're undermining our troops and aiding and abetting the Enemy :)

  2. My post from the other day is amazingly similar.

    Great minds and all that....

    Down the hatch!

  3. Oh wait, I forgot, I'm also supposed to worship trained killers who're killin' a buncha brown folks for Jeeeeezus in order to protect our freedoms from, err, folks who never attacked America (the Taliban have never -- *EVER* -- attacked America). Well gosh darn it, I guess I'm gonna hafta report myself to MiniLuv for reprocessing for not quite understanding how it is that killing people who never attacked America "defends our freedoms", dagnabit.

    - Badtux the Snarky Penguin

  4. And sometimes, it just feels like a tide of grief and useless tears.

  5. "National Piss Your Pants Day" is a great snarkologism. Did you come up with the phrase-concept yourself?

    Re: the trained killers -- one of the five books I'm currently reading is "Generation Kill," which follows a company of Marine advance reconnaissance troops during the invasion of Iraq. These guys are the "point of the spear" as it poked in Iraq's guts. They're typical universal soldiers -- some crude rednecks like we liberals stereotype in our anti-militarist mind (like I do, at least) and some are damned smart, like a USMC version of a Green Beret. Gave me more horror, and also more respect, for "the troops." Many of them will be like killer cancer cells circulating through the body politic when they return to the U.S.

  6. I'm numb today. No, not from drugs or alcohol, just hate thinking about the government response to 9/11 has been sooooooooooo stupid.

    ps, love the snark PeeYourPantsDay, lol

  7. I've been moping about all day, having trouble concentrating. I should be working on my thesis, but instead I find myself thinking about all that has gone wrong with the USA since 9/11/01 -- much of it with 9/11 as an excuse. I think of the blood of servicepeople and civilians on our collective hands; I think of the war on civil liberties. This is SO not the USA I grew up in!

    I grieve.

  8. All I know is that some jerk driving home from a football game on the wrong side of the freeway in the early morning hours of 9/11 served as a good reminder for me that on a day to day basis, I have more to fear from my own countryman than I do from any sort of foreign terrorists. Just sayin'

  9. This is why I quit over at the Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler site. I could no longer even talk to those people. "Never Forgive" always seems to take precedence over never "forgetting", because you are right -- they do tend to forget a lot.

    I get tired hearing about how the attack of 9/11 was an "act of war", when the reality was that 19 individuals pulled this thing off with the tacit approval of a leader of a small group of rag-tag misfits hiding out in the Afghan desert. Our reaction did more to boost the 'importance' of this group than anything else. We overreacted, and continue to overreact.

    Yes, the attack and the damage it caused was horrific. But we could have easily rounded up those responsible and dealt with them quick, fast and in a hurry. The Taliban offered to round them up for us and deliver them to the Hage, but that wouldn't fit into Bush's agenda of using this attack as a pretext to enter into another war of choice, completely unrelated.

    We killed Osama Bin Laden. There may be 40 more Al Qaeda floating around somewhere in the world. It took another administration to do it, but now that it is done, let's get the hell out and put an END to this mess once and for all.

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