Monday, December 20, 2010

Obama to embrace the Catfood Commission

... supposedly will propose cuts in Social Security in his State of the Union address.

Now, granted, this is from The Politico, which is run by a GOP political consultant. The fact that even they say that the notion is entirely nuts, however, is telling. If Orange Boner and Jim McDumber aren't jumping up and down with glee at the very notion of Obama doing their work for them, it's only because they're dumber than a stump.

Meanwhile, as a public service for tomorrow's retirees, who will be so impoverished by Obama's Catfood Commission that they can't even afford catfood as a source of high quality protein, another recipe....

Rat Etoufee

You'll need about two rats per person.

Get a large stock pot. Clean and skin the rats and rub them down with a seasoning mix of salt, cayenne pepper, black pepper, thyme, and a dash of cumin. Put them inside the pot. Cut up a couple of carrots and thow them in. Quarter an onion and slice a full bulb of garlic (7 or 8 cloves) in half, germ and all, and put them in the pot. Now pour enough Bock beer into the pot to go about half way up the sides of the rats. Bring to a boil and reduce to a slow simmer. Cover pot and cook, turning the rats and refilling the beer about every 20 minutes. You will know the rats are done when the meat comes off the bones without too much effort.

Take the rats out and pick the meat from the bones. Return the *bones* to the pot and cover with water. Simmer for 2 hours, then remove and strain the liquid into a container. Finely chop a small onion, a stalk of celery and a bell pepper. Now take a large cast iron skillet and heat a cup of peanut oil to medium high heat. With a wire wisk, slowly wisk in 1 cup of flour. Continue wisking, without stopping, until the roux turns a dark reddish brown color (if you burn it, start over). Add the chopped veggies and mix in until soft. Add the rat stock (about a cup per person) and stir well until somewhat thick (like a glaze). Chop up the rat meat and add it to the skillet. Cook for a few minues longer and serve on top of rice. Garnish with Louisiana Hot Sauce.

-- Badtux the Culinary Futurist Penguin


  1. If he does that, then I will officially see little daylight between Barry and Snookie Snowflake, other than maybe DADT's repeal.

  2. Tux, your recipes for sewer chicken will, in time, be seen as a great public service. I would only ask you to expand your commentary to include trapping methods as a lot of city folks don't normally engage in these activities.

  3. Clearly, the Penguin is not politically correct or he would have suggested dumpster diving for the vegans out there.

  4. I assumed dumpster diving. But dumpsters generally have a shortage of high quality protein. Well, other than the rats that also enjoy dumpster diving :).

    - Badtux the Culinary Penguin

  5. Your recipe assumes that future rat-eaters will own a pot. And have beer they have not already drunk. Highly unlikely on both counts. I suggest future recipes based on cooking things in empty coffee cans, over trash fires in shallow pits, with a bit of human urine for seasoning.


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