Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Time to talk gun control again?

Unless you got kidnapped by aliens, you know that a South Korean college kid shot up a college yesterday, killing dozens of other college kids. As conservative blogger Jon Swift reports, this is all the fault of liberals. Why, if liberals simply allowed college kids to pack heat, they woulda capped that gook before he even got his first dozen kills!

Naturally, as a snarky penguin I must agree. I believe that every American should be armed with an AK-47, 5,000 rounds of ammunition, a RPG-7 anti-tank grenade launcher, and 100 rounds of RPG ammunition. Then we can be a peaceful and polite society just like Iraq and Somalia. After all, just ask Rep. Mike Pence of Indiana, who will be swift to tell you that going to the market in Iraq is safer than going to the market in Indiana. Especially when there's a blue light special on sexy lingerie, in which case you best have your body armor on or a herd of women and transvestites and Rudy Giuliani will send you on to the great beyond...

Remember, gun control is hittin' what ya aim at! As for the notion of a national dialogue on gun control... oh look! Over there! It's a missing young blond girl!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

Below: A couple of shoppers at an Indiana market prepare to obtain the last Playstation 3's in town.


  1. I am overcome by remorse and grief. This terrible tragedy has shown me how wrong I was to use my liberal mind-control brain waves to force the 82%-Republican state legislature to deny college people the right to pack heat to classes, sporting events, weekend keggers and pub crawls.

  2. They will take my guns out of my cold dead fingers.

  3. That can be arranged. Indeed, *is* arranged, somewhere in the United States, every day as a heavily armed SWAT team breaks down a door in some neighborhood somewhere in America and shoots dead some dude who has a gun in his hand.

    - Badtux the Realist Penguin

  4. HFC. Every student also needs quick draw lessons for those inevitable face-offs in the quad.

  5. In the US, it would be easier to legislate against trigger fingers.

  6. I've never owned a gun in my life, but as I watch the Right Blogosphere twist itself into rhetorical knots trying to find a way to blame the shootings on liberalism, I'm thinking a gun isn't such a bad idea. After all, I need some way to protect myself from these fucking nutjob conservatives...

  7. Thank goodness I'm no longer a student. I'm afraid to get a gun. If I had one, who says the government might not decide to pack me (and my gun) off to Iraq?


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