Monday, May 23, 2005

Let's go NOO-coo-lar!

Yessiree, the North Koreans are doin' nukes. The Iranians is doin' nooks. Hell, even Chavez down in Venezuela wants to do nukes, and Brazil is enriching uranium. So with the threat of a radioactive planet growing by the minute, what is the Senate of the United States doing? Why, that's simple: They're going nuclear too.

Does this mean that Washington D.C. is going to become a radioactive wasteland? What, you thought it wasn't, already? The big reason to keep the filibuster is because it slows down the making of laws. Now, making laws is sort of like making sausage. Sometimes we like the results, but I suspect the majority of us here really do NOT want to see how a sausage plant operates. And truly, the results typically are not so great anyhow. Sausage are bad for you, full of grease and fat and stuff you don't want to know about. Same deal with most laws.

In case you have't figured it out, I'm all for anything that slows down the making of laws. The way I figure it, we need maybe three or four laws a year passed to protect us from new ways that people have figured out for ripping us off, and then a few budget laws for the military and social services and such, and that's pretty much it. The current situation, where we pass so many laws that Congressmen can't even read them all before voting on them, is just plain ludicrous. I mean, do you think any Congressman read the Patriot Act, all ten inch stack of paper of it, before voting on it? When it was presented to them six hours before the vote? Puh-LEEZE!

Now, if the Democrats *REALLY* want to go nuclear, they should promise to filibuster every day for the rest of the legislative session until the right to filibuster is acknowledged by Frist the Cat Killer and his cronies. Not only would this be a threat that would make the Republican neo-con big government lackeys whine in pain since they'd be unable to pass their borrow-and-spend big government agenda, but it'd also have one very big benefit for the American people: as Will Rogers put it, "This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. Something is going to get smashed." If Congress is frozen in place, why, less stuff gets smashed!

Problem is, this would require guts, party unity, and organization on the part of the Democrats. And as Will Rogers *also* remarked, "I am a member of no organized party. I am a Democrat".

So anyhow, as we all contemplate the virtues of glowing in the dark thanks to North Korean, Iranian, Venezuelan, and Brazilian nukes, let us contemplate the virtues of *Congress* glowing in the dark... at the very least, without budget authority, Preznit Horse Wanker isn't going to be able to do more stuff to piss these folks off. Oh sure, there'd be some issues when disabled folks no longer get their disability checks, VA hospitals close for lack of money to pay their workers, and the Army runs out of bullets because they can't pay their suppliers, but really, I think we can make some SMALL exceptions to the glow-in-the-dark strategy. But once those exceptions are made... filibuster high, filibuster low, filibuster by day, filibuster by night, filibuster until the Cat Killer screams, Senator Reid! Let's watch Washington D.C. *GLOW* in that noo-coo-lar light, yessireee!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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