Monday, June 14, 2010

Bambi is a thug

Just sayin'. Bloody 4-hooved rats are running amok, killing motorcyclists, breaking into bars, and now attempting to break into a jail. I fully expect to hear on the news tomorrow that Bambi did a drive-by shooting outside of a Disney store.

There's only one good place for one of these four-hooved rats, and that's on a barbecue spit. Just sayin'.

-- Badtux the Deer-hatin' Penguin

Hey, if *you* had thousands of dollars worth of damage done to your vehicles thanks to these critters, you'd have a sour disposition towards them too, yo!

6 comments:

  1. Ok.
    But did you have gazillions of dollars of damage to your vehicles? In which case try the haunch with the elderberry jam sauce. Dee-lish.
    But if you are merely projecting ...
    ;-)
    --ml

    ReplyDelete
  2. Not merely projecting. Blasted varmints smashed in the front of one of my cars by leaping out in front of it, and managed to destroy a pickup truck via the same way. And they come into your garden and eat it to stubble. Grr!

    Four-hoofed rats. Just sayin'.

    - Badtux the Deer-struck Penguin

    ReplyDelete
  3. Mmmmm, venison.

    ReplyDelete
  4. When I lived in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, I knew several people who had been injured by car-deer collisions. Now that I think about it, two were hurt by running off the road to AVOID deer. My resolution was that if one ever leapt in front of my pickup, especially on a snowy road (which covered the time from late September to early April) I would make minimal efforts to avoid it, but the best course of action for my survival would be to plow over the poor devil.

    ReplyDelete
  5. My husband and I take several trips a year from Silicon Valley to the Eastern Sierra. Often in the summer we drive up Friday night, and we ALWAYS see deer by the side of the road at night. It's only a matter of time, I'm afraid, before we have a collision...

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  6. Minerva - I don't even *like* venison, maybe because one of my relatives made deer sausage when I was a kid and I ended up puking my guts out from food poisoning. Damn four-hooved rats tryin' to kill me even when I eat them. Fuck.

    Bukko: That's pretty much my plan too, but a 250 pound buck ends up in your lap, you're pretty much as dead as if you ran off the road into a tree. Maybe moreso. Still, my Jeep is so friggin' tall that it sure ain't gonna be doing any evasive maneuvers, and it's high enough that maybe I'll just run over the bastard.

    Minerva II: That's one of the reasons I sold my motorcycles. Two people I knew died from running into deer at night. Enough.

    - Badtux the Bambi-hatin' Penguin

    ReplyDelete

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