Wednesday, February 02, 2011

Family values

John Boehner's boner. According to the National Enquirer, our favorite (supposedly happily married) Ooompa Loompa is getting his boner drained by a female (presumably) lobbyist.

I say "presumably female" because snakes don't have externally visible genitalia and thus it's very difficult to sex them... but Republicans don't care what they're boning anyhow, just ask Larry "I Am Not Gay!" Craig, heh!

-- Badtux the Family Values Penguin

Updated! For Sungold's benefit, a picture of our favorite Oompa Loompa!


  1. Jeez, Badtus, I've considered you a bloggy friend up til now.

    But that image of Boehner as Oompa Loompa? That will never leave me.

    I do not think it can be forgiven. It is just too true, and too vivid.

    (It doesn't help that Boehner is from my adopted state of Ohio, which makes him all but impossible to purge from my unconscious mind.)

  2. Heh, 'Tux, I'm hopin' that someone pitches the idea for a TV sitcom called Boehner's Boners. Should be enough fresh material to keep it running in prime-time seven nights a week.

  3. On further consideration, how about the 3:00 a.m. time-slot once a month?

  4. Sungold, just for your viewing pleasure I've placed a real photo of Boehner as an Oompa Loompa above :).

    Phil, who would watch that? I doubt even Republi-cons would watch that. Now, if you have a nude Ann Coulter and a nude Michelle Malkin and a nude Snowflake Snookie hosting it... well, I still wouldn't watch those ignorant skanks, but at least the Republi-cons would. But Boner Boehner? Ick!

    - Badtux the Realist Penguin


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