Tuesday, May 31, 2011

A book review

Boldtext Pew Bible: King James Version (Hardcover)

This book has an incredible amount of sex and violence, including incest, entire cities being destroyed, plagues of frogs and locusts, and even the death of 99.9% of the world's population in a giant flood. Irwin Allen would have had a field day making a television movie of this book, there's just so much entertainment here, much better than Twilight.

But the downside is the incredibly one-dimensional characters (with the exception of that "Jesus" dude, who is this really groovy stoner hippy type who, like, preaches peace and giving up material possessions in pursuit of the spiritual and stuff like that when he's not, like, toking out big time, but also has downer times when he wonders why he bothers), and an utterly disjointed plot where characters pop up, do a few things, then disappear for the rest of the book. Dude. This book really needed an editor, not only for the major, major plotholes (*TWO* different stories about how the Earth was created? Dude!) but for the atrocious spelling, grammar, and rampant run-on sentences. For example, at the beginning of the Book of Matthew there's this one sentence that literally runs on for multiple pages of "begat" after "begat" after "begat"! Which is okay if your name is James Joyce, but this "God" guy who wrote this book isn't anywhere near the talent that James Joyce is. Dude. Get a real copy editor for your next book, 'kay?!

-- Badtux the Book Review Penguin

4 comments:

  1. I;m quite fond of run-on sentences.

    Cheers!
    JzB

    ReplyDelete
  2. It sounds like an exciting story, 'Tux, but I think I'll wait until they turn it into a TV mini-series. Some books aren't worth reading, especially poorly written ones, because inept writing is usually a reflection of inept thinking.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Badtux ( the might be) blasphemous P. Do they have lightening at the South Pole? lol

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  4. That book will never catch on. That main character couldn't possibly be more antithetical to the mindset of Americans. You'd have to have some kind of opposite-Jesus that people would believe in, like Gordon Gekko, or something.

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