Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Michelle Bachmann and the Message from God

Michelle Bachmann opened her crazy trap and opined that the recent East Coast earthquake and hurricane were a message from God.

Dear Michelle: If God is omnipotent enough to send an earthquake or a hurricane to "send a message", why can't He just send an email or an IM or even a Twitter tweet? What, the keys on these keyboards are too small for His big giant omnipotent God fingers or something? But... but He's GOD, right? He can just *create* him some little fingers to press the keys if he wants to, right? I mean, you're sayin' that He can create the world, and dwarfs, and everything else in it, but He can't even send a fucking TEXT MESSAGE?

Lame, dude. Just sayin'.

- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

9 comments:

  1. He could take over the EBS and broadcast a message on every freaking TV channel. after all, He had no trouble directly communicating with Moses.

    Bachmann is a moron. She's not electable, which is why Little Dubya has vaulted to the front of the pack.

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  2. He could even cure Mr. Bachmann of his "Gayness". Because if he ain't, Gay, then God misfired on that one.
    "The Bachmann Clinic" great name for a Gay dating service I guess. LOL

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  3. Self respecting gays don't get cured. Forging an authentic identity is no work for sissies.

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  4. Someone asked Crazy Michelle if she'd submit to her husband like the Old Testament sez to. After dodging around a while she finally said sure, but to her "submit" meant "respect". What she *really* meant, I'm sure, is that she doesn't actually have a husband -- she has a wife.

    - Badtux the Snarky Penguin

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  5. Strap-ons are ambidextrous.

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  6. Don't you mean "am-bi-dick-trous"?

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  7. ......and why did He (she) knock those angels off the National Cathedral ???

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  8. Send a text message?

    He can't actually write;
    note even His own name.
    After all, he signs with a cross ;-)

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  9. This comment has been removed by the author.

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Ground rules: Comments that consist solely of insults, fact-free talking points, are off-topic, or simply spam the same argument over and over will be deleted. The penguin is the only one allowed to be an ass here. All viewpoints, however, are welcomed, even if I disagree vehemently with you.

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