Thursday, April 21, 2011

Flat penguin

Picked up some stomach bug, been either on the throne or flat on my back all day long. Entertain yourselves.

--Badtux the Flat Penguin

8 comments:

  1. To health with you, Badtux. If it's the same thing I had, it will last only a couple of days... though mine may have been the consequence of attending a Passover Seder for which my stomach at least was unprepared. (No, I'm not Jewish; I just have a lot of Jewish friends.)

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  2. Ah man, you gotta get well. I gotta have my daily Penquin Fix

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  3. Hey Tux! Maybe you got sick because you ate some steak that was held together with meat glue.

    Have you heard of this chit? It's a substance derived from coagulation factors in animal blood that can be sprinkled on bloody scraps of meat, which are then rolled together in plastic wrap and refrigerated. When they're unwrapped six hours later, the scraps are so well-bonded that they can pass for prime filets.

    The link is to an Australian tabloid TV program (bonzer accents in it, mates!) that shows step-by-step how it's done. One of the dangers of the technique, aside from it being fraudulent, is that it takes the high-bacteria exteriors of meat scraps and puts some of them on the inside of the filet, where they are not cooked to a high enough temperature to kill the germs. So maybe that's what made you gut-sick. That, or you're eating someone else's feces that they did not wash off their hands after they took a dump.

    Watch the video and prepare to throw up a little bit in your mouth. Oh wait -- you're already doing that.

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  4. Bukko, I don't eat steak. Indeed, I haven't eaten any beef for the past week.

    My current status -- my abdomen is making ominous gurgles, but when I mount the throne all that comes out is gas. Progress! I'm monitoring my fluids intake and weight and making sure my kidneys haven't shut down, so far so good. Hopefully tomorrow (today?) I'll be over it...

    - Badtux the Improving Penguin

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  5. My favorite joke from Family Guy:

    Lois: How was your bowel movement, Peter?
    Peter: Eh, I got some, but I didn't get the troublemaker.

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  6. And pass... and pass... sigh!

    - Badtux the Somewhat-amused Penguin
    (Hey, cats, why are you holding your noses?!).

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  7. I am sure you will come through this just fine you penguins are tough sum bitches I mean wow that movie march of the penguins if you guys can handle that there is no way a little stomach virus is going to KO a penguin maybe you ate some bad tuna?

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