Senator Tom Coburn (R-Oklahoma) isn't really known to be a Commie faggot-loving liberal. He's called for the death penalty for abortionists, said that the country was under attack by a secret gay conspiracy that had “infiltrated the very centers of power in every area across this country." He once said that in the town of Coalgate, Oklahoma, "Lesbianism is so rampant in some of the schools in Southeast Oklahoma that they'll only let one girl go to the bathroom. Now think about it." Ole' Tommy Boy, despite his physicians' oath to "first do no harm", is also a firm advocate of torture, and enjoys regaling interns with pictures of dead fetuses and STD-afflicted vaginas. In short, Dr. Tom is the wingnut's wingnut, nuttier than pecan praline that's mated with peanut brittle and hatched a bowl of mixed nuts.
Yesterday, however, Dr. Tom had enough. After four hours of Attorney General Gonzo answering "I don't recall" to each and every question, either lying or having the memory of a newt (no no, the lizard, not the Grinch), Dr. Tom pounded his meaty fists on the table and bellowed, "It was handled incompetently. The communication was atrocious. You ought to suffer the consequences that these others have suffered, and I believe that the best way to put this behind us is your resignation."
This sentiment was also echoed by other notorious liberals such as Senator John "Man-on-turtle" Cornyn (R-Texas), Chuck Grassley (R-Iowa). Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.), and Arlen Specter (R-Pa.).
Gonzo is *so* fried... and it couldn't have happened to a better person. So I'm just going to sit here sipping soda and smirking at the sight of Abu "I love Torture" Gonzales sweating buckets as his beady little eyes whirl frantically around looking for anything, anyone, that might seem even a teensy bit sympathetic to his plight...
-- Badtux the Sadistic Penguin
A little comment for right-wing readers: watching Gonzo sweat is funny no matter *what* your politics. How many different ways can one man say "I can't recall" anyhow?! BTW, it was his outright fibbing and lying, not the actual act of firing the attorneys, that had the Republican senators irate. If Gonzo had simply come out and said "Yes, I fired these attorneys because their politics did not match the goals of our administration", there would have been tut-tutting from the Democrats (of course) but no problem with the Republicans. But then he had to come out and *LIE* about it. Just like the Clenis lied about that blow job. Just like that.
Okay, so how did you get the penguin drinking Coke? I am a Coca-Cola fanatic and I love penguins - putting the two together is wonderful!
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't matter what the Senators do, think, or say. Not one of them. Dear Leader is The Decider, and he'd rather hack off and eat his own feet than let anyone tell him what to do. Every voice added to the chorus for Gonzo's resignation merely increases the likelihood that DubYa will keep him to the end, just to spite 'em.
ReplyDeleteOf course, Gonzo is now such an albatross around the neck of the administration (and, by proxy, the entire Republican Party) that keeping him on will hopefully have the same effect on the 2008 elections that keeping Donald Rumsfeld had on the 2006 elections...
Thanks for keeping track of the Repuglicans for us. Evil Spock is so sick of the news right now.
ReplyDeleteSharecropper, the penguin is the Linux penguin as ray-traced by the Open Source POVray program on Linux, with a coke can added in to the mix. Then repeated images were ray-traced with slight movements of the flipper to get the coke can up to his mouth, and a GIF created of the resulting ray-traced penguin images (coming down is the same images as going up, just run in reverse). Note the shadow. Cool shadow. Typical of ray-traced images.
ReplyDeleteI'd like to take credit for doing the ray tracing and stuff, but actually it was a dude in the Netherlands who did it. The holder of the copyright on the Linux penguin says anybody can use it for anything at all as long as they're not using it for illegal purposes, so he did. And then I did (heh!).
Gerald, that reminds me of another Gerald, who did something stupid legally-speaking and lost an election to a peanut farmer. Huh!
Missing you crazy, frigid opinions over here...on topics just like this.
ReplyDeleteOh, and ya I don't agree at all.
If it weren't for a the rediculous liberal media pressing this into some kind of rediculous scandal, it wouldn't be as big of a deal as it is. The entire escapade is being blown completely out of proportion.
Those attorney's earned their spots through politics, and guess what? They lost their positions that way too. The fact of the matter is that is just the way of that specific career.
But of course, if you hate anything related to Bush/conservatives/christian/republicans/anythingnotradicallyliberal than this is blockbuster!
Heh. Jonathan, watching Gonzo sweat is funny no matter *what* your politics. How many different ways can one man say "I can't recall" anyhow?! BTW, it was his outright fibbing and lying, not the actual act of firing the attorneys, that had the Republican senators irate. If Gonzo had simply come out and said "Yes, I fired these attorneys because their politics did not match the goals of our administration", there would have been tut-tutting from the Democrats (of course) but no problem with the Republicans. But then he had to come out and *LIE* about it. Just like the Clenis lied about that blow job. Just like that.
ReplyDelete-BT
You're damn right this is funny. I hope it starts a trend.
ReplyDeleteLove the graphic. I see you shaved your mohawk off. Ah well...