Tuesday, September 04, 2007

I want a pony!

So a Christian fundamentalist asks me, puzzled about the fact that Unitarians and Quakers and similar religions take no position on whether there is a heaven or hell, "why belong to a religion if it doesn't promise you heaven?"

Apparently, many people believe that the only reason to belong to a religion is not because it is a moral framework for behavior, but because you'll get lots of goodies if you belong, and any religion that doesn't promise you goodies for belonging is bogus. If they don't promise you Heaven, why go to church?

Ohhhkay.... I think I can dig where they're coming from. But I'm more practical than them. I don't want something after I die. I want something now. I want a pony! If a religion doesn't promise me a pony, why should I join?

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin


  1. You're well on your way to becoming a Cargo Cultist (which is especially appropriate for computer programmers!). :-)



  2. Never fear. There is Cod Fish pie for good penguins and Bad Tux.
    In the sky...
    by and by...

  3. Well, Dave, you must admit that cargo cults are the only religion whose gods have actually provided the promised goodies at some point in time.

    My point (?) was more along the lines that if the only reason you have for belonging to a religion is for the promised goodies, you probably belong for the wrong reason.

    - Badtux the Religion Penguin

  4. Just keep digging, Badtux. There has to be one under all that BS, eh?

  5. Since it's all about me, I want you to know that, like the little boy in the joke, I shoveled the s--t, and now I have the pony!

  6. There is no way I want a pony, it's to expensive and time consuming to have horses.

    I want a, um, hooker?

    An employed girl toy?

    Wait, they are always trouble, okay, I'll settle for a beer.

  7. Hmm. I think you have an idea there for a religion, BBC. The Church of the Holy Brewery. It doesn't promise heaven for its members. It promises beer!

    Sadly, that sounds no less ludicrous than some churches, which make similar promises of earthly riches... but at least you can drink beer.

    - Badtux the Beer Penguin

  8. Do Mencken and the Mighty Fang like ponies? If you get a pony, will the Mighty Fang groom it.

  9. I've always thought that all the rewards were odd. A truly altruistic religion would punish its followers for doing good, wouldn't it? That way, their actions would be truly altruistic devoid of selfish motivations. (Actually, the Diamond Sutra does take the paradoxical stance that merit is non-merit and is therefore merit and so on.)


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