Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Godless heathen

I always suspected that of my readership. And now I have proof. May the Great Penguin strike you all down with rains of herring! And I'm sure He will bring me my pony any time now.

I have just one question: Can one penguin belong to two churches at the same time? Because while Tuxology has obvious attractions for a penguin (that whole Ice Cathedral thing and the whole thing where the Great Penguin created us penguins in His own image), the Church of the Holy Brewery promises earthly rewards, all for the small donation of five dollars to the bartender at your neighborhood church in exchange for a mug of the Holy Brew. I'd love to belong to both churches at the same time if possible, both for the earthly rewards and the promise of an eternity of rest and pleasure in the Great Iceberg Floe In The Sky (with infinite herring!) after death, but if you can only belong to one religion... hmm. Hard choice!

-- Badtux the Religious Penguin


  1. You'd have to ask permission from both religious organizations.

    Evil Spock's religious affilation is to the NFL Sunday Ticket.

  2. That's all we need, hoards of drunk arrogant penguins strutting around. When are these stray penguins going to go back to the Antarctic where they belong? And more importantly, why don't we have a military base in the Antarctic? One never knows that the penguins down there are cooking up on those long Antarctic nights.

  3. Why do you think that you have to be monotheistic? Many civilizations flourished with multiple gods and goddesses, and seemed to do quite well with folk worshipping multiple beings of higher power. Frankly, I think you are putting more stress into your life by worrying about it...just sit back have a beer and some fried herring, and enjoy life!

  4. Should be no problem is worshipping at both altars. After all, if the Rethuglicans can have homophobic homosexuals, why can't you have herring and beer?

  5. you could always take the roman or greek notion that you worship your own gods, but give due props to any locals, and, should they prove out, go ahead and incorporate them.

    you could have a unified tuxology which incorporates the two.

    i would think that drinking beer while wearing a tuxedo would easily qualify. although you might want to reserve the white tie and tails for oktoberfest


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