Saturday, January 14, 2012

The French conspiracy

So Newt Gingrinch's SuperPAC is running ads in South Carolina blasting Romney because Romney can... speak French?

But hey, maybe the Grinch has a point. If not for France helping us out during the French Revolution, we'd have an actual real national anthem that can be sung by mere mortals, rather than the screech-inducing ode to fireworks that is our current national anthem, which trips up far too many pop tarts who attempt to scream it out at the beginning of football games. Not to mention that football would be played with round balls, kicked with your foot, rather than being some bizarre mashup of rugby, wrestling, and line-dancing. And if not for the French, we'd all speak English.

So thanks for nothing, France. Seriously.

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

3 comments:

  1. "Screech-inducing ode to fireworks"--tee hee. Can I steal that?

    ReplyDelete
  2. They should get god out of all anthems.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Well, at least he isn't running anti-French ads with something like the Statue of Liberty in the background. ;)

    ReplyDelete

Ground rules: Comments that consist solely of insults, fact-free talking points, are off-topic, or simply spam the same argument over and over will be deleted. The penguin is the only one allowed to be an ass here. All viewpoints, however, are welcomed, even if I disagree vehemently with you.

WARNING: You are entitled to create your own arguments, but you are NOT entitled to create your own facts. If you spew scientific denialism, or insist that the sky is purple, or otherwise insist that your made-up universe of pink unicorns and cotton candy trees is "real", well -- expect the banhammer.

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.