Monday, December 08, 2008

Obama is not a natural born American

Well, at least that's what the lunatic fringe of the right wing is saying. That birth certificate that is posted on Obama's web site and has been held by actual reporters? Lies. All lies. The fact that the State of Hawaii says that it's the real birth certificate and that they have the original on file? More lies. And so on and so forth. Whatever inconvenient facts you bring up, they always have some way to "discredit" it.

So, let's have a little contest:

  1. Obama has a U.S. passport and has travelled extensively for decades using that passport. U.S. passports are only issued once the State Department verifies with your state of birth that the birth certificate that you presented with your application for a U.S. passport is in fact legitimate. Your job: Come up with a conspiracy theory explaining why the State Department issued Obama a passport even though he was actually born in Kenya or Indonesia or on Mars.
  2. Hillary Clinton and John McCain both ran dirty ugly campaigns against Obama, accusing him of everything under the sun, of being a closet Communist, a terrorist sympathizer, whatever. Your job: Come up with a conspiracy theory explaining why neither Hillary Clinton nor John McCain accused Obama of not being a natural born American and thus not Constitutionally qualified to be President.
It's an ugly job, I know, coming up with bizarro conspiracy theories for the benefit of right wing lunatics. But it's a necessary job, since they're dense as a stone and would never come up with these lunatic conspiracy theories on their own. We must make sure that the right wing morons thoroughly discredit their cause by spouting the most insane crap possible. I know it's a hard task, my friends and neighbors, but your country is depending on you! Conspire away!

-- Badtux the Snarky Penguin


  1. The giggler in this whole story is what would happen if the wackos actually got their claim upheld.

    We didn't elect Obama. We elected 538 electors, 365 of whom promised to vote for Obama in the real election on December 15. If he were to be disqualified, the electors would be released from those promises and free to vote for anyone they like.

    Welcome to the Electoral College, young Einsteins, and say hello to President Clinton.

  2. Actually, it is possible to have multiple passports (e.g., from different countries). Passports are based on citizenship, and it's possible to be a citizen of more than one country. For example, it's possible to acquire citizenship by being born in a country, or by being naturalized into a country (which does not necessarily require relinquishing citizenship from a previous country), or by being born to parents of a differing citizenship (e.g., born of American parents abroad).

    But, being a citizen has no bearing on whether one was natural born or not (although the natural born requirement is present for president).

    Additionally, there's the issue of being born in a territory which has subsequently been given it's independence.


  3. Well,
    Firstly, McCain was born in Panama.. his dad was military..

    Secondly, any child of a U.S. citizen (Barack's mom was a U.S. citizen) is automatically a 'natural born' U.S. citizen. This is true no matter where the body physically exists on (or off) the earth when it first exits the womb. This applied to McCain.

    End of Story.

    Don't take this to disagree with his Hawaiian Birth certificate.. It is simply to show the whole argument is moot.

  4. And let's not forget the birth announcement that was shown to be printed in the Honolulu newspaper in 1961. How's THAT for a bunch of tricky Democrats. Traveling back in time to conveniently plant a birth announcement in a state a half a world away from Kenya.

  5. One word: ILLUMINATI!

  6. The important thing with this conspiracy is not meaningless issues such as "facts" or "reality." No, it's all about giving reich-wing mouth-foamers something to get all frothy about. They had to sit back and listen for six years as left-wingers screamed for the impeachment of George Bush on trivial grounds like deliberately blowing the cover of a CIA agent, violating the U.S. Constitution by spying on Americans without a warrant and starting a war based on lies that resulted in the deaths of more than a million people. This is all about giving them a counterweight to that. You don't think they f@acking well believe this shit, do you? But they can pretend they do. And for the 23%ers, pretension is reality.


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