Yes, boys and girls, welcome to today's show WATCH THE ATTORNEY GENERAL! In the left corner: Attorney General Abu "I love torture!" Gonzales, weighing in at a perky 150 pounds. In the right corner: Fun-loving penguins everywhere, weighing at, hmm, maybe ten pounds apiece? So what weapon is Abu going to use THIS day in his war on fun... hmm...
Ah! Give us ten pounds of Patriot Act, and ten pounds of Obscenity Prosecutions! Remember, boys and girls, Abu "I love Torture!" Gonzales doesn't want you to stroke your bones while watching (or reading) some of that nasty "porn" stuff. Well, not unless you're piled naked in a pyramid simulating sodomy while grinning GI's look on, anyhow! And if you DO decide to stroke your bones, remember: your Attorney General, thanks to that fine and tidy "Patriot Act" that lets him spy on anything he wants to spy on just as long as he says "it's about terrorism!", knows every dirty picture that you're using to make things more exciting, and he's COMING AFTER YOU!
So that's today's update in "Where's the Attorney General?". Tune in tomorrow for yet another edition of "How the world turns my stomach"!
- Badtux the Snarky Penguin